HOW FAST EDDY SLOWED HIS ROLE

Temecula, CA – Many of my stories originate from the scene and the inhabitants there of. The scene is a magical place with a spin all its own. People look at it and it seems so lucrative, like a carnival. But we all know that when the carnival leaves town, it leaves the majority of people who came to see it behind in its departure. Sometimes people approach the scene and like the carnival they go home after trying to throw shows, with some memories good and bad. This is the story of Fast Eddy, who bounced off the scene to slow his role, and grow his green to make some dough.

I do have a few friends outside the music scene. Like my readers, they get to hear rather than read, some of my scene adventures. One day while I was sitting with Fast Eddy, Eric, and Phil watching some San Diego sports, Eddy pipes in with the revelation that he is going to start throwing music shows. However when a person ends his business plan with the epilogue statement, “After all, how hard can it be?” it doesn’t give you a warm and fuzzy about their success. My reply was, “It’s harder than it looks but I’ll point you in the right direction.”

Fast Eddy blew into the scene like a Nor’ Easter and blew out almost as quick, a little worse for wear. But they don’t call him ‘Fast Eddy’ because he’s slow. He soon bounced back on his feet despite having to inject himself daily with insulin, relocate his aged parents to a nursing facility, and take care of a sister and nephew. Of course as a former used car salesmen’s lot manager, pressure and persistence are not strangers to Fast Eddy. Soon word came down the pike that Fast Eddy was going to open a dispensary. I thought to myself the idea seemed a little ambitious again for someone who had no training in how to do one, plus the vote for Prop 19 was coming up. Still I rode shotgun on his early forays for location and hooked him up with some of the local MMJ activists for advice.

Time passed. Toward the election date Eddy called and asked how I saw 19 and I ran it down to him. I also congratulated him on being open and being successful at it. I told him that he had impressed me with bringing this project to fruition. Since opening he had pretty much been working 13 hour days but he had managed to weather the domestic strain and had caught no heat for the operation. The day after the election I got a call from Eddy. We talked about the results and though Eddy never told me how or if he was going to vote on 19 directly, he invited me over to review his dispensary. Though I have no MMJ card and have not tried to gonzo my way into the local pot shops here (which so far have operated with no hassles or problems that I have heard about) for a story, I took the invite from Fast Eddy as a Karmic nod from Mary Jane Green, a ‘thanks for looking out’ gesture to satisfy my curiosity.

The morning of our tour Eddy stopped over and we smoked half a blunt. Great, I thought, a snack for later. After all, it’s not like you make a ton of money being a social butterfly, you just have a ton of fun and the Universe provides. I again explained to Eddy why I hadn’t been too curious about his place, not wanting to get anyone in trouble on a brief law discrepancy. Not missing a beat Fast Eddy shot back, “Fuck that. I own the place!” as sure enough it lists Eddy as CEO on his store business cards. And we were off.

I’m a reviewer, not a critic, but we both look at the details. After seeing Eddy’s operation I’d have to say that it wouldn’t matter if I was a critic. I was genuinely impressed with Fast Eddy’s professional operation. In the short time of his start to finish, Eddy has gathered a fine staff of handsome people; the female counter help are both hottie and knowledgeable. I’m an expert in both fields, I like young women and I smoke the chronic. Nuff said. The security staff doesn’t look like they do part time work up in LA at some dive either. The gentleman I met looked qualified but not threatening, kind of the way policemen were before the pot prohibition. The shop location is also a well thought out design or lucky break. Knowing Fast Eddy, it’s probably a combination of both if you know the hustle world. Being in the midst of other alternative health shops and thereby not disturbing the existing neighborhood surroundings is classic.

Business has been climbing steadily for the cozy location with the hand painted walls depicting blue sky and clouds and desert. The décor is soothing. Each shop area room is functional and clean. There is no clutter but there is art. I have never been inside another dispensary so I can’t speak for how they are decorated but I wonder if this art is symbolic of what drew Eddy to throw shows. At any rate, this wellness place is the only one that has crossed the scene’s path, so to speak. Along with security there are smoke alarms everywhere, in every room.

In the shop display room are glass cabinets that hold the products available for sale on location. Here again I was impressed. There are a wide variety of cannabis wares available in this room that appears more an uptown boutique than a head or smoke shop. There is a wine chiller that holds fresh edibles, such as S’mores, pumpkin bars, Bundt cakes, and other stuff that looks yummy. Another free standing cabinet holds clones (White Rhino, Hindu Kush) that you can buy. Everything is listed as to strain, variety, ingredients/purpose, etc. As I browsed, the soft 80s R&B dance hit Secret Lovers poured out at elevator volume from a satellite FM compact system in the corner. The lighting is subdued but the case with the smoking kind of cannabis, aka pot, seems translucent. And what tasty treats do we have today, Little Red?

Behind the counter, Jessica, 26, a ‘townie’ shows me the selection. Indicas, a PM weed strain for sedating, treating acute pain, and reducing nausea is available in Lemon Kush, Mendo Purps, Big Bear OG, Diamond OG, Mike’s Tahoe OG, White Russian, Pineapple Kush, Candy Kush (all top drawer); Kern Crush, Bubba Purps (mid-priced); and Fresno OG for the more thrifty minded. On the Sativa AM side (used for activating, anti-anxiety, anti-depressant, focus and creativity, hence my personal fav; Eddy’s is Indica) she showed me Anzanian (ann-ZAH-un), Blue Dream, Sour Train Wreck, Green Crack (the weed, not the rock), Hawaiian Haze, Sour Diesel, Pineapple Express (all top drawer); Sharmin, Circus Freak, Blue Widow (mid-priced); with Twisted Oliver, the bargain.

Also on tap at this shop till you drop weed wonderland are the Specialties, which include (Cannabis) Lotions, Chapsticks, Glycerin Drops, and Ear Wax, a hemp oil concentrate. You can also become more educated about the medical side of marijuana as you stroll through the access rooms and read the wall mounted information boards, and that’s for free. I was lucky enough to have Nicole, a MILF local who is ‘mother hen’ of the operation, as my guide.

It is an interesting juxtaposition that Fast Eddy, a married man who says “This is the best job of my life” in being surrounded by fresh green medical grade marijuana and attractive females, a situation most would trade places for in a heartbeat, is finally in a place that has slowed his role by centering him in his natural element. Thanks to the staff of Gregory, Nicole, Jessica, ‘Juan Valdez’* who hand picks, Doctor Nick, the shop’s neighbor, and of course, Fast Eddy. (*- not his real name or ethnicity)